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James Cameron: Total Douchebag.

James Cameron completely stole Pocahontas. No question about it. He probably sat his old fat ass down, watched Pocahontas, took a shit, and then rewrote Pocahontas and named it Avatar.

Even with the plagiarism it was a shitty storyline. Everything was predictable. I saw the movie without 3D, so there were no "cool effects" or any shit like that and it sucked tits.

I heard there was supposed to be a special exclusive screening of Avatar that included smell-o-vision, so you could smell whatever was on the screen at the time. And basically it smelled like James Cameron's shit the entire movie.

Although, I have to admit that Sigourney Weaver was a babe in this film. NOT. She was an ugly fucking troll who is way too old to be acting.

James Cameron thought he could get away with presenting the world with a huge pile of shit and calling it a bouquet of roses. In other words, Avatar is basically just a big dick-slap to the face.

Precious: Based on the Novel "Push" by Sapphire

Precious is a piece of shit and utterly repulsive. This was a disgusting movie about lesbians and fat fried-chicken eating nigglets promoting incest.

Gabourey Sidibe is a whore. Plain and simple. She's a whore who likes to play whores in movies. In Precious, she sits her fat ass down and lets her father fuck her. TWICE. Then she has two babies and decides she wants to call it rape. Bullshit. She wanted it, and she got it. Fat mother fucker deserved to be raped.

Mo'Nique won an Oscar for her shit performance as the mom. Watching the movie, it took me a good half hour to figure out that she was actually a woman. That bitch looked a hell of a lot like a man to me. Bad ass acting if I ever saw any.

I also heard Oprah was on this shit. Oprah what the fuck? It took me a good half hour to figure out that the fat ass main character was actually played by Gabourey and not Oprah. Oprah would like this gross shit.

My favorite line from the movie was: "You ain't shit you fat bitch. That's why nobody wants your fat, black ass." That's how I felt after watching this goddamn awful shit show.

Babel

Babel sucked ass. It was boring as fuck and I hated almost every minute of it.

The only slightly exciting parts were when the retarded japanese girl flipped her skirt, took drugs, or some other crazy shit. Other than that, the film was garbage and a waste of time and air.

Cate Blanchett was a real bitch too. Her character wouldn't stop bitching about germs and needles and other shit. It was a good thing she got shot early on, because that shit got old fast.

The plot was supposed to follow four separate families of different ethnicities and languages. The problem was that they picked the four most boring fucking families on the planet. And of course, one of them was an illegal immigrant in the U.S. Big Fucking Surprise.

Also, there were numerous plot holes. First of all, there are no ambulances, doctors, hospitals, even a band-aid or alcohol in Morocco. It was all lies. The only truth is that MOROCCO = SHIT.

Plus the pervert director made us watch the little Moroccan fuck masturbate over his sister. This didn't add shit to the story and it was fucked up.

The King's Speech

The King's Speech sucked. Simple as that. I can sum up the entire movie in a short paragraph:
Man stutters. Man gets speech coach. Man and speech coach fall in love. Man becomes king. Man delivers speech.

Bored yet? I don't give two shits about a king who can't speak right. And to make matters worse, the ending speech wasn't even that good. He still stuttered and kept having to pause between words.

And don't give me this shit about how it was cinematically excellent because no one really gives a damn about that. Basically, whoever wrote this script just took the smallest, most uninteresting thing to ever occur in history and jotted it down during their two-hour morning-shit.

This movie is for senior citizens. It's just a great big fucking yawn fest waiting to happen. If you're looking for a good nap, go see this movie, because I promise you the best two hours sleep you'll ever get.

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